Monday, June 29, 2009

Hamish and Hair

My little brother hamish who is 12 has decided to get dredlocks while he's in fiji. He's booked in to get them in a weeks time, I can't wait to see what they look like, I just hope they look good. By the way my brother hair is ringlet curly and shoulder length. He's growing into a little man :)

Fiji the Begining

Omg I'm in fiji. The weather is beautilful. I'm loving it.! The flight over was great, I love clouds. I was sick the first couple of days :( thought I had swine flu :( But I don't I all good now. I went to the best with family yesterday it was so warm and fun. Argh I don't want to leave my family again.

I broke down yesterday and cried, I saw a happy couple and it made me think of Scott. Fiji is not a good place to be when your missing your other half.

I've been able to text him which has been good but I don't often. I called him saturday night and he spoke to my cousi, they were both so nervous it was cute. Scott just said hey at the start not game enough to say his name incase he got it wrong. :) what a cutie.

I've been keeping a diary of what I do each day, that I'll re type into my blog when I get home. We get to melbourne late so we're staying at a hotel which I'll use the internet there.
I'm missing all friends and family and Scott.

I'll talk soon Annalisa the very hot

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


Hello and Goodbye for now.

My flight is tomorrow morning.

I've said goodbye to Scott, I cried and he held me. Argh I miss him already.

Love all you guys lots.
I'll be back before you know it.

Annalisa on Holidays

Tuesday, June 23, 2009


Well I had the most amazing weekend. Spent Friday and Saturday with family friends and Sunday I stayed at Scott's. It was so good. We watched telly and went on the motor bikes. But I got scared before we went for our big ride so I  just went around the house and paddock.
I'm going to miss Scott so much when I go to Fiji. We've spent a long period of time apart before but not over different countries.
He was at school Monday which was good we had a good time together and ate too much chocolate sort of food. :) He makes me smile so muchly. :-) Argh I'm going to miss my sexy, funny, hot, amazing, smart boyfriend. 

Annalisa the holiday worthy?

Thursday, June 18, 2009

My Great Boyfriend!

I had a great day with Scott today. He is working today but he texted me in his breaks and they were also the sweetest messages (I'm going to miss him so much these holidays). It's so good putting more effort in for each other. I can't believe how proud I am of us.

Deep down I knew Scott and I were not going to split up Tuesday night but it was an option and that scared the hell out of me. I can't imagine my life without him and I don't want to. You know one day me and Scott may break up and that's just a fact of life, some things just don't work out. But me and Scott are working. And it is I've never been so happy. We are in a really good time now. :9 It's pure bliss.

I think I can be happier and not so stressed out with Scott now because even though it will kill me, I know if we ever break up in the future I will survive. I'm more happier now because I can just be with Scott and not worry because I know everything will be alright. He loves me and reminds me that he does everyday. He's truely the perfect man. I love him x x x x x

After the gym Kellie took my to dancing even though I didn't dance, I just cried in front of the heater and the dance studio. In the drive there "Breakeven by The Script" was on. I couldn't stop crying when I heard it, she turned the radio off for me. I really do like that song because its so truthful, but I'm glad it's not true for me and Scott though.

Annalisa the Happier :)

Wagging school the new thing?

Well I didn't go to school. I don't know why I didn't. I walked half way to school, then walked back home again. I sorta just wasn't up for it. I guess I sorta wasn't well.

I haven't done much today just watched tv and read a book.

The sorta newish well not that new now but "Miss Potter" I watched that on tv today. It was G rated so I thought it would be a good kids movie to watch it. But wow was I wrong, it was a great movie but it was so sad I cried and I didn't want to cry today.

Annalisa the Wagger

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Those 3 Days

Monday night.

Mum and I want to go to Pink. I know it should be just a night for me and mum but i asked if Scott can come anyway. Of course she says yes. But she said I have to call him, I was dreading calling Scott because tonight is the night I talk about A. Scott said he was too tired to talk but I call up anyway.
He said he doesn't want to go to Pink and that I'll have more fun without him which isn't true. But I except his answer sadly.
He's not in a good mood. I wanted to leave the A thing for a night but I knew if I don't I would never tell him.

Talking about A has always been a touchy subject for us. But he has his reasons.
I say to Scott that I confronted A about what happened.
Guess what he said "Who cares" I was so upset.
He knew how hard this was for me then he goes and makes it a joke or something.
I say "Fine" and change the subject.
But then of course he says really does care and wants to know what happened. I tell him a much as I could but I could tell he wasn't listening. I done the right thing by telling him all he had to do was listen. I left it as is and went to bed as did he.


Scott wasn't at school he was working. But I always still texting him anyway even though he couldn't reply. My friend Doug texts him about motorbikes and he replies not straight away but he does reply and I didn't even get a text. That hurt me.

I was on the bus to go to the gym. And I text Scott how come Doug got a text and not me.? He was still working. Half way through my gym workout and I check my phone. Hmm the message I got from him was crazy. I cried in front and the people at the gym.
Scott said " Its getting hard to find time for each other you reckon we should start thinking about going our own ways. I don't but its gunna get hard soon."
I wanted to scream but I couldn't a friend of mine at the gym came over and talked to me about it but it wasn't much help.

Me and Scott talked that whole night about us. We both said we still loved each other and that we want to stay together but with him working its hard to see each other and its putting a strain on our relationship. We talked about breaking up yet we both didn't want that, but we both know that we can't work as well when he is working. We agreed to sort of refresh and re connect, make time for each other and if we can't we'll slowly break up.
Believe its so hard typing this words. But I need you guys to hear them and so I can know what you think. Me and Scott are still going to be the same around each other but try to be more loving and caring for one another. We're going to make time for each other more.
It was the hardest thing in my life reading that text but I knew one of us was going to send it soon enough. But it was good in a way because we got to say what was important in our lives and what we wanted in it and how we would achieve it (luckly both of us want the same thing... to stay together and be in a great relationship:). We didn't act childish and say stupids things and break up, instead we talked about how we can work out our problems. I was so happy in the way we acted towards each other. I'm still madly in love with Scott.

Get this clear: Scott and I are still together and will remain that way for many years until we are no longer able to make a satisfying relationship with each other. We both don't want to be together if we never see each other, in our words that is not a relationship with us.


I was scared about going to school today because I was scared things would be different between me and Scott. Once I saw him, he left his friends and we went and sat down and talked. We both said nothing has changed between us and that we still love each other. Scott said our love has grown, in these past day or two we have bettered our relationship. :) Through today I can see that we were both more loving towards each other. Scott made more hmm how do I say it... loving touches. He also said I love you more. I'm so proud of us for being so young and still able to have a loving relationship and be able to work out our problems in a good manner.

I spoke to my friends in class and they said I and Scott had handled it maturely.

Annalisa the Better!

The guy who talked to me at the gym on Tuesday was Kim's sister's boyfriend. I got a message from Kim that night, it was good to talk to her. She is so good to me.


Wow what do I say to you guys. I can't believe how much my life and the way I feel has changed in the past three days. So much of what I tell you will come as a shock but it is also I shock to me too!

Monday, June 15, 2009

Fiji Soon

In 9 days I'll be on the plane to Fiji, I can't wait. It's a four hour flight there and a five hour flight back. I think the flight there is at 9am but I'm not sure. It'll be so good to see my family over there after 3 years. I think I'll be there for 15 to 17 days. I'll be sun baking while Scott is going to be working in the rain. I'm going to be so sad without him. I miss him already and I haven't even left yet.

I think I'll get a Fiji sim card so I can still text him which will be good but I think it's expensive to text over seas but I'm not sure.

I'm hoping to take some great photos these holiday which should be good. :) Can't wait to post them up here. I'l try my hardest to get to a internet cafe of something. I think I'll get my hair braided and platted.

I last post before I go on holidays will be on the 24 of June. I'll miss you guys too!

Annalisa the Fijian


Saturday night my friends Jess and Jazz stayed over. It was good fun to chat up with my friends but I not all my friends came though I'll get all my friends around for my birthday.

It as good fun. It actually was the reason I confronted A.

Well dressed ups. Talked to ages and watched movies. Then dressed up again in the morning. My friends are so pretty. Makes good photos.

So good.


Dealing with It

Well as I said yesterday I do have something to say.

When I was younger (13) something happened between me and a family friend. He was older than me and he touched me in ways that I shouldn't have been. Till this day I still blame myself because I didn't try to stop him but I sorta didn't know what was happening. It all sort of over boiled at that time and some bad messages were sent. In time he got over it and sort of never thought about it again but I never recovered I felt like I was abused, sexually. Me and him still talk and I guess are friends but I never felt the same. After work yesterday he was home for the weekend so I thought I go see him. Well his mum asked the night before.

When I got there his mum wasn't home, it was just me, him and his younger brother but he went to his room as soon as I got there. I'll call him A. Me and A watched a movie. I thought this would be the best time to tell him and confront about how that time a while ago made me feel. I moved to sit on the arm rest of his couch. I said "I don't hate me but I need to say this to you." But as soon as I did this my world went black I ended up saying sorry and bursting into tears, this wasn't how it was meant to go. He grabbed me a held me to him. My head was in his neck and shoulder bit, crying into him. I was trying to talk and tell him what I was meant to but I couldn't my sound wasn't coming out just blurs of words. I wanted to scream. I couldn't breath. He started rubbing my back and body to calm me but I didn't want him to touch me. I was so shut down though that I couldn't move.

He rubbed me and sort of hummed to me. Once I'd stop crying I got some tissue's and began to speak. I talked about how that night made my feel and how he ruined our friendship. Even though we're friends now it could have been better. I said sorry about some of the messages too. But he wouldn't say sorry, well he hadn't yet but that's all I wanted to have some closure. Before I could any more his mum got home I had a milo and left.

At home I texted A I hadn't finished talking to him but there was family there so I didn't want to cry, so I started texting him with a joke but it ended badly. I said ".......Haha if I get a back rub every time I cry I'll have to cry more" but A replied saying "Well all you have to do is get rid of Scott and you can have as many as you want, whenever you want like now" I didn't want to hear that. I said that's not going to happen.

I got serious.

I said how that I felt scared after he done that to me and it made it hard when I started going out with Scott. I said that I was only a kid and that I didn't know what was going on and that I think I couldn't say stop because maybe I confused it to being love instead it was actually A obstructing of our friendship.

Then I went on to ask "What were you thinking when you did that to me and Why would you do that to me? I need to know." But all he said was that "It was just the heat of the moment" I don't know what I was excepting him to say but that wasn't it. I wanted to here more. But I guess wasn't going to hear it.

I said I had to go and I left it at that. I will talk about it more another day maybe. I still don't think I said enough. I didn't say I felt abused I was too scared to. I wish I had now.

Today I texted him about him and the was he held me and I told him the it wasn't apperate and that I will never left anything sexual happen between us and I love Scott. A replied "Never say never. But don't worry I'll never do anything to ruined our friendship unless I was sure I liked you." Me and A are friends I don't want our friendship to get ruined again because he wants me.

Scott knows what I went through with A and I'm going to tell him what happened Sunday because he needs to know that I've dealt with it. Scott doesn't like A and I don't think he ever will.

I'll never forget or forgive with A done but I can deal with it better now.

Annalisa the Better?

Sunday, June 14, 2009


I've got a lot to blog about believe me but it can wait till tomorrow I got to get my head sorted out. It's nothing bad well it's sort of brave.

Missing Scott


Thursday, June 11, 2009

My Tiring Day and Last Night

School was pretty fun. Had to exams but they were ok I think. English was fun with the boys. Doug wrote hmm something interesting in my english folder. :)
Scott pretty much just tickled me in the belly all day. I told him to stop but I sercertly didn't want him to. :) Evil. I was pretty tried today though had a big night last night. Had gym for a hour and half and hip hop. Gym was good I saw some friends and met some new people which was good. But I think the footy player were a bit too nice. I think I slowly getting better at my running which is not my strongest point. I'm loving the gym how it's getting me fitter but its sort of a bit boring sometimes.
I was meant to be going to Scott's this weekend but of course planes change. I've got the day off tomorrow too, which should be good but now I've got nothing to do since I'm not going to Scott's. (Mum just said she wants me to clean my room even though its pretty clean, I'm a girl who like her room clean) His mummy (Jenny) didn't want my there since he'd be at work tomorrow and so would she and I'd be home alone. Which is fair enough but it doesn't make me miss him any less. Argh wish I was still going there tonight!
I got a bit confused in maths today, my brain wasn't concentrating. Argh so tired. Think I'll have a early night.
And I've also got to paint my nails by the way.


Tuesday, June 9, 2009

My Day

Well I had a very very good morning. Scott woke up horny and I sent him some hmm images :) I know I'm bad. It was fun though. Argh I miss him. But i'll get to see him tomorrow. It's good to wake up to sexy messages. :)

School was good. Had maths exam I think I did pretty good. English exam was weird the essay question didn't make me think so I could really think of anything good to write. Not happy.

Dancing was hard work. Worked on this dance for overa hour thinking how to make it better and add more onto it. And I'm stuffed. But it was fun though.
I'm so loud and crazy at dancing :)

Talked to Scott on the phone for a bit it was good. 

Anna the sleepy

Monday, June 8, 2009

Home Sweet Home

I'm home, home sweet home. And unpacked too!

Exams tomorrow not lookingforward to it. I haven't really practised that well and I'm scared I've forgotten about it all this weekend. Wish me luck.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Friends ans Time

I want to spend more time with friends. If I'm not spending my weekends with Scott, I'm usually away or working but it's got to stop. I miss my friends. I want to have a girly sleepover and dress ups. Nothing is a good as that. :) And eat chocolate and pop corn while watching some comdey/romantic. I can't this weekend because I'm going shopping with my mummy for Fiji, I think. But hopefully the weekend after I will. I'll tell my friends and get me to remind me about it. I love the time in class that I get with my friends because they are so great but of course I want more time with them, so the weekends will be it! The only thing is that some of my friends like to drink and my parents don't want kids drinking and my place. Ek! So I'm going to have to tell them that. Hopefully they wont mind that much. I can't wait to have a weekend like that, the only thing is will Scott come?


My Day So Far

Last night was goood my couisin's family friends came over. And they watched the rugby, I'm not much of a rugby fun myself so I watched a movie.

Today we went to town Eu and done some shopping it was great. I got some clothes for Fiji, four books, ( yes i know I got too many but I couldn't choose), lip stuff, and some other little things. We also went to the lolly shop, argh I fell in love. So much to eat, such a little tummy.

I missing Scott, he's working today. I hate not being able to text him. I was want to hold him and read what he has to say. Can't wait till I can see him again. Have to wait till Wednesday.


Saturday, June 6, 2009

Cousinly Love

This weekend has been good so far. It's good seeing my little cousins. Argh they're so cute! Well I got to go I've got to see my little cousins dance routine. :)


Missing Scott

Stuff and This...

I was bullied at school Thursday and Scott wasn't at school to protect me, he's been working with a builder all week. It's hard him not being at school but its even harder him not being there when I need his support most. Even after school he couldn't be there for me. He was so tired he went to sleep early and I only ended up getting two messages. But I have to admit they were really sweet.
It was Justin's birthday Thursday too. I texted him but he was fighting with his mummy, he wasn't having a good day. Lately him and his girlfriend have been having troubles finally he texted me about it and just said it wasn't working and they had broke up. I hope he finds his perfect girl. When I was younger I thought I was his perfect girl, I was 12 :) I know now and for the past few years that we are just mates. Justin helped me with the bully, well we just talked about it. It helped having someone to talk to but it didn't take away the hurtful things that the bully said. It's hard not having Scott at school with me but it's a reality that I'm going to have to live with soon.
I've got exams all next week, just like the rest of Victoria. I'm a bit worried it's my first VCE exam EK! I wish me luck! I'm going to practise this weekend and me aunty and uncles. I'm there now.


Thursday, June 4, 2009

Invading People

On Monday I did my first got from Town H local paper. I had to take a picture of a lady with CF. I had to go to her house and take it. I found out I don't really like photojournlism because I don't really like in vading there private place. I walk into someones home, walk around there house and look and a good photo place, the force them to be happy for a photo. I feel bad, I don't like annoying people like that. I'll continue to take photos in my town S, but if it gets to bad I'll stop it. I think I'd rather go into wedding photography or something. But I did enjoy talking to the lady. It was lucky I already knew her before I went to her place. We're sorta family friends but not that close.

Anna the Faint Hearted

Loving Hugging Weekend

I went to the gym saturday morning then took the bus form town P to Scott's. I was scared driving past where the bus rolled and killed three people two months ago. I arrived safely.
Scott's mum,  Jenny picked me up. We talked about how Scott would help her with the gardening when he was a toddler. How Cute!
I had the best weekend with him, he was so so so cuddly
Saturday I slept the whole night in his bed, it was warm. I slept naked, argh imagine if we got caught!
I helped him sand a wood fire box he was making for his boss. It was actualy fun helping him do stuff. I got pretty dirty.
I meet Scott's boss for the first time, Ross, it was so cool that he was like 'Hey Anna"  He already knew my name and remebered it.
I was still really tired so I slept alot, while I was sleeping in the arvo, Scott made me a chocolate cake. Can anyone say AWWWWWWWWW :)
I ate too many pieces of course.
I couldn't have asked for a better weekend with Scott he's amazing. I want to marry him now! :)

I stayed till Monday morning and took the school bus to school.



I'm sorry I haven't posted, I got lazy sorry.

The rest of the of work experience was absolotly great, if I wasn't with Scott I would have moved up there and started my traineeship but I guess I need to think seriously and not jump to the first offer I get.
Scott's cousin, Lou took me up to work thursday an friday it was great talking to her. Thursday morning I gave her my photography portfolio because she said she'd look at it at work. She asked me to come and see her on my lunch break if I was bored. I wasn't bored but I went anyway. When I got there she said she had a surprise. I had a interview planned for me with the head photgrapher of her paper.
I was nervous but I had no other choice I was already there and I couldn't leave. We talked for a bit and he liked my work. He said he wanted to do photgraphy with him as work experience. I said yes. Then he asked for me to work for him to take the photos in the town I live in because its far away from where he works. I said yes! 
I took me first photo on Monday.